Laughter

I’ve been teaching tennis recently. Call it whatever you want – we’ll combine all your thoughts into one elongated description of “a second-ish job that doesn’t pay much but is a nice way to hit around and meet some new people.” There were my 6am lessons with Dr. Goldberg, an early morning with an Italian grandfather who by the end of it walked me through his 15 grandkids, who were appropriately detailed on his ugly sweater. After a few trial runs, I was asked to do a standing night adult clinic. At this facility, it comes in all shapes and sizes, so I didn’t know what type of group I would inherit. However, I met them – Jay, Jeff, Matt, and Rocky – and somehow, things clicked. They were about my age, into sports (other than tennis), and good enough to not need me to teach the basics but not experts to the point where I could show them how to move their feet or where to stand when approaching the net.

After getting comfortable with each other, pretty quickly I might add, there was a banter that started to develop. Jay would cutely harass me if he missed a forehand with a quick look and remark of “that was a bad feed. Give me another one.” To which I would. Matt, who sweats more than I have ever seen in a 66-degree indoor bubble, goes barreling into the side nets that bifurcate the courts, only to come up cursing after losing a point. They’re friends, they’re cousins, I can’t keep it straight – neither can Rocky, who is the 4th wheel but a great piece of the crew.

A couple weeks ago, 40ish minutes into the 90-minute clinic, I found myself uncontrollably laughing. It had to do with the combination of Jay’s remarks and Matt’s frustrations of losing a point, followed by Jay and Jeff laughing at Matt’s intensity, and me just truly guffawing at that combination. It became contagious, and as the ‘coach,’ I felt bad, but truly couldn’t control it.

I came home that night on cloud nine. And thought to myself – ‘I can’t think the last time I laughed that hard.’ And no, this isn’t a criticism to my wife or friends or family who I have been with over the past several weeks. It’s an observation. But it was so pure and spontaneous and natural – it reminded me of being a kid in middle school again when someone maybe tripped and fell into the pool (bad example) and it was funny enough that everyone was laughing.

I don’t want to talk about what must not be named, but it did insert a major speed bump for meeting new people, having fun with people, and putting you in situations you haven’t been in before. I think that’s what caused the uncontrollable laughter. A new situation. With great people.

Whatever communities we have or don’t have, and however we do or don’t get out of our comfort zone, there’s something telling me and telling us that we should be doing it more often. Because getting out of your comfort zone doesn’t necessarily put you in front of your funny friend or at the holiday dinner table – all things which can be and are still funny. We need to embrace our neighbors, our dodgeball leagues, our book clubs, our co-workers, and yes, even strangers on a train. I complimented a cute eight-year-old kid’s (Air Jordan) shoes on the subway the other day, and his smile made my day and my compliment may have made his and his mother’s. Maybe another bad example.

Cutting through the bull shit, laughter is so important. It’s good for the soul. It’s good for the mind. I can’t put my finger on it, but the trends the past couple years have made it harder to find those moments of laughter. And all I want to do is encourage us to find them again. Because they are great.